{"id":901,"date":"2014-05-20T22:46:34","date_gmt":"2014-05-20T22:46:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.silviaskingdom.com\/?p=901"},"modified":"2017-09-30T13:53:32","modified_gmt":"2017-09-30T20:53:32","slug":"return-to-zero-my-story","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.silviaskingdom.com\/?p=901","title":{"rendered":"Return To Zero – My Story"},"content":{"rendered":"

I know for many, the death of a child, an infant, the loss of a pregnancy is unthinkable. Unfortunately for many, it is a reality. After I lost my first baby, Alex, at full term, I was shocked to find out how many women suffered such loss-the latest estimates state there are at least 100 stillborn babies in the United Stated every single day<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

\"IMG_0010_alexFs\"<\/a>Yet, it’s a loss that nobody talks about. Here’s an excerpt from my book “Losing Alex<\/strong>” (available at Amazon) <\/a>where I explain how hard it was for me to find any book that talked about this kind of loss:<\/p>\n

“This was 1995; the internet was not what it is today. \u2018Online\u2019 shopping was still something that would not take off for several years. If I wanted to find a specific book, I had to search the yellow pages for book stores, thrift stores, used stores and so on. I recall finding a rather large used book store with literally thousands if not millions of books\u2026 I am not exaggerating either! This store was gigantic; I never saw such a large collection of books, even bigger than a library. They had a \u2018grief\u2019 section and I did find a couple of grief books there, a handful were about miscarriages, but still nothing specific about stillbirth. Come to think of it, I could not even think of a movie or TV shows where they had a baby die, with the sole exception of a couple of episodes of \u201cLittle House on the Prairie\u201d and perhaps soaps. I was beginning to understand this was truly \u201cthe\u201d unspeakable loss, \u201cthe\u201d invisible loss, a loss so great nobody wanted to talk about it; a loss so inconceivable and so horrible that many people declared it as being the most overwhelmingly painful experience of their life; the death of which they were least prepared for. I was beginning to understand. My grief was colossal and all-encompassing. No loss is more difficult to accept and feels more unnatural and less understood.”<\/em><\/p>\n

On May 17th a movie aired on the Lifetime Channel (the DVD will be released June 17th) titled Return To Zero<\/a><\/strong>, starring Minnie Driver. This movie spoke to me in ways not many can possibly grasp, with the sole exception of those that lived my nightmare. Because… it was a nightmare. Here’s the trailer for the movie below…<\/p>\n