Standing Up For My Son

As parents, we always want to encourage our children to be able to stand up for themselves. Anytime I feel I may not be doing a good job at this considering how much I advocate for my Nicky, all I have to do is look at my healthy son, now 14 years old. He ROCKS! He’s totally willing and able to stand up for himself. He often asks me how to deal with so-and-so and comes home from school telling me how he successfully dealt with whatever situation he was confronted with. Nicky however, is a different story. Raising a child with a rare disease is profoundly confusing and complicated. With something like Epidermolysis Bullosa, we are forcedRead More

Strength

If there is a sentence I hear a lot from family and friends in general is how “strong” I am. Before the stillbirth of my first baby, before the miscarriage, before Nicky’s birth, I somehow thought that strength had something to do with “grin and bear it”, or having somehow the ability to have no qualms or uncertainty of what to do or how to handle a variety of situations. But strength, I found out, has nothing to do with our outward projections of it, nothing to do with muscles, or not showing emotion, and everything to do with allowing ourselves to feel whatever needs to be felt at that moment, let it all out and then dealRead More

Speechless

Minnie Driver is probably my favorite actress nowadays. A few years ago she tackled a subject near and dear to my heart by portraying a mother who had a stillborn baby in “Return to Zero“. Her performance was simply phenomenal. She totally nailed it. Her character’s  experience was also fairly close to mine, and there is truly something to be said about watching someone on TV feel what you felt. It’s hypnotizing. I am a very “visual” person anyway, so this movie was truly special for me. Fast forward a few years, and now we have Minnie portraying a Special Need Mom in the new TV show called “Speechless”, in which she is a take-charge mom to a teenage sonRead More

Blog Quotes Part 3

Feel free to save them and share! To save the bigger version of the image, click on the image first to load it, then right click to save image. Nicky loves and cherishes his hands, and wrapping them is as important to wrap for us as any other part of his body. It’s just incomprehensible to me how this horrid disorder exists and it completely changes our view of life in ways we never knew we needed to know nor learn. Not sure I mentioned lately how much I hate EB. There you have it. I hate EB. This grief thing is just bizarre. I rarely think of Alex and cry anymore, good gosh, it has been nearlyRead More

How To Show Respect to an EB Parent

The other day Nicky had his first appointment with a Physical Therapist in our home. Aside the fact that this was the first time in his life that his insurance approved such a thing, I wasn’t sure exactly how she was going to accomplish anything with Nicky, knowing that moving at all is just so painful for him and she can’t touch him at all. My worries however, had to take a backseat when she said something to me you should never, ever say to a parent of an EB child, especially one as old as Nicky. Without knowing anything about EB at all, she told me to “be careful” of what I put on his wounds. “YouRead More

The Truth is: I Don’t Know

Ever since Nicky graduated from High School, one of these questions seems to be on everyone’s lips: “What is Nicky doing now?”, “What are his plans?”, “Is he going to College?” or a variation of these. The truth is… I don’t know. As a parent of a child who is medically fragile (to say the least), I don’t know what my son’s plan is, or what he will do. He would like to do things, but on most days it’s a challenge just to drag through another painful day without trying too hard to think about the future. Planning for something like College seems impossible when I don’t know if he’ll even make it to next week. I canRead More

No Sick Days for Me & It’s Ok

I remember clearly being sick when I had a “regular job”. It was pretty simple, really. I would call in sick and I would stay in bed all day. I even remember with sadness when I left work when I started bleeding when I was 7 weeks pregnant back in late 1995-from there I went to the Doctor who did an ultrasound and could not detect a heartbeat and sent me home on bed rest. My employer at the time was extremely kind and told me to stay home “as long as I needed to”. I laid on the couch for days, not doing a thing. The bleeding kept getting worse, culminating in a miscarriage. This was 7Read More

What I Want Everyone To Know

I was recently asked the following question by a reporter: “What do you want others to know about genetic disorders and the challenges individuals who have them and their families face?” So I wanted to share my answer here: I think the foremost thing I would like people to know about EB in general is that this condition exists and it’s horrible. There is no sugar-coating EB or trying to make it worse than it is, we couldn’t imagine a worse condition, ever. The pain the patients go through, especially in the worse forms, is unimaginable. Awareness is key. Without awareness we have nothing. Without awareness we can’t hope to raise funds to find a cure. Then IRead More

Blog Quotes Part 2

Feel free to save them and share! To save the bigger version of the image, click on the image first to load it, then right click to save image. Nicky in the end is my ultimate teacher. It’s because of his lack of bitterness, lack of hate, lack of negative thoughts, that I am becoming a better person. I would love a weekend away with my husband to feel like a wife and a woman, but an EB trained nurse to provide child care is nonexistent. I made peace with that. Being compared to others does something to our self-esteem that is extremely damaging.. I don’t particularly enjoy seeing him in more pain, but he has decided longRead More

Blog Quotes Part 1

This is the first of what will eventually be many posts over the next several months or longer of quotes pulled right out of this blog of mine. Feel free to save them and share! To save the bigger version of the image, click on the image first to load it, then right click to save image. While you stare at my child, is it too much to ask you to smile? A little smirk? A Wave? Small talk? “Hey kido, having a good day?”, anything will do. I promise you, he won’t bite. I have learned that life is far from fair and we would be better off flinging that thought as far from us as possible. EBRead More